I finally figure out what it was that I have always been feeling. I feel inadequate as if I need some validation that I'm worth something. Always. Nothing I do feels like its enough or good enough. I feel unwanted and misplaced. I feel lost and blind. I have started to resent myself. What's the point of living when you have no reason? I get the same message everywhere I turn: "You are nothing."
My family, my peers, my society... all of it. I don't belong or need to belong. I'm not unique or special, I know that. Sure, people will sympathetically try to console and say things like "Of course you're worth it!" but really... I know that it's not true. So stop trying to appeal to your humanity and face reality. Not all of us are needed.
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